im still getting used to saying “my fiance” but i L.O.V.E. getting to say it now. i get to marry my best friend and the man of my dreams. i feel so lucky!@#!)(@*#!
(Source: keithasavage, via flamingothoughts)
i just dont want to be a person that doesnt realize until theyre in their 40s that they spent too much time chasing after the wrong things. i have hopes and dreams for adventure and reaching my fullest potential in my career, and i think that these things are so important. however, i cant help but notice by middle age most people ive talked to will share that none of their accomplishments mattered if they had neglected the people they loved most-neglected love itself and the kind of fulfillment in life that can come from that and that alone. my mentality has shifted a lot as ive thought about what it will mean to marry my best friend. and in this shift has come an overwhelming sense of satisfaction with my life and whatever the future holds. this is because i’ve made a conscious promise to myself to put my loved ones first. and i truly believe that decisions made with this as the driving factor can only reap life rewards.
the world has so much to offer and a lot of shiny things blinking at us everywhere we turn; reminding us of who we aren’t YET and what we need to DO to make us into the most exciting, attractive human beings. as cliche and obvious as this sounds, the best thing the world has to offer is love and relationship, and i think this twenty-something age is a time where it’s really easy to forget because we’re even more susceptible to all the shiny sparkles. we’re even more apt to define who we are by what we do. i don’t care if you’re a corpo-maniac climbing quickly up the ladder or helping starving children in uganda. there’s always people in EVERY field doing what they’re doing for the wrong reasons, and it usually can be traced back to the fact that they need this experience for their egos… they need to be defined by what they do because they haven’t yet realized that the most important part of life is the people you love and the people you surround yourself with. or they just forgot.
none of this is to say of course that love and relationship doesn’t also accomodate hopes and dreams and adventure. if anything, love as a priority can make these things more beautiful and enriching. i’m only saying that there is a balance, and that when you put the important things first, there’s less ego and fear attached to the other stuff and life can more organically and fulfillingly (totally not a word) unfold. jeez, who am i? my mom?
here’s to reminding ourselves every day that our relationships are what ultimately make us who we are, and that at the end of our life we won’t be sweetly reminiscing over our resumes.
It is a time of working and waiting – and yet I am still living and enjoying and fulfilling. I love the life Tim and I are building with one another. I love nights where we giggle in a green haze by ourselves in candle light, sparkling eyeballs smirking at one another – enveloped in our love; our young and old love all in one. I love eating the dinner he makes on his dinner nights. It always tastes like genuine effort and passion. No matter what it is. I love having the time to read books that make me better and watch films that inspire me. I love every Thursday night where I am so full of butterflies that I can’t eat dinner before my acting class, and how fulfilled and excited for the future and the human experience I feel as I walk to my car afterwards parked far down Lankershim. I love making plans; going to concerts, making people dinner, going on misty burning hikes, planning mini trips on budgets. I love not making plans and staying in slippers. I love getting to be there for my friends, and getting to be separate from them at the same time. I can slowly feel at least layer 1 and layer 2 melting off, the layers that were crusty with fear over how you thought of me and what they might be saying, exposing a more honest and free self to the air. . I think the sky is bluer now – I notice clouds and the moon and little details like oddball street signs that I just have never really seen before. I am busy but I have time; time to get a back rub time to go on a walk time to breathe in really deeply time to learn what I want to learn time to soak in. Maybe I always had the time but I wasn’t ready to see it all, to really feel it all. I think I was moving like lightning so I wouldn’t have to take everything moment by moment. That was a time. But this is a different time. This is the now. And I love the now. I love drinking it all in.
This morning I chose to let myself get an extra hour of sleep in place of working out before work. I’ve worked out 4 times this week already, and yesterday I had a longgggg day. I’ve been tempted to guilt trip myself about skipping today, but to be honest, I feel the most energized at work today than I have all week!! Don’t be fooled that the moral of this story is to skip the work-out. However, the moral of this story IS to listen to your body and its needs. Give your body a chance to recover and rejuvenate itself.
Beyond just the exercise facet of this lesson, don’t buy into the American guilt-trip that says it’s cool to run on 4 hours of sleep every day and always be doing something. That’s just plain bullshit founded on our country’s obsession with productivity. Take a nap outside whenever you have the opportunity, make it a priority to get 7-8 hours of sleep every night, and make sure you PENCIL IN intentional nothingness/or self-care time during the week. I believe we are entitled to this. Yep. I said it. Entitled.
Rest is key to our overall healthy and SANITY!
I’ll camp out any night with a tent that looks like this.
i have an awesome friend who taught us to make sushi.
In the spirit of soul-searching and self-care, this song makes me feel fuzzy and warm and hopeful about life every time!
Honoring the Body - Religion and media have put us in a really confusing place of tension over whether or not to embrace our bodies for all they have to offer, and how to do this without obsessing, hating, or overindulging. So far, I love this book. It’s challenging me to love myself and others and our BODIES in a way I’ve never quite considered before; in eating together, in exercising, in intimacy, in sharing. You can get it for like 4 bucks on Amazon, HERE.
The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke - If you’re a twenty-something in this economy, you need to read this book. It’s realistic, it’s easy to understand, and it’s truly truly empowering to have this kind of knowledge about your money and savings and strategies and all that jazz. I read this cover to cover in a day and a half and plan to use it as a financial bible for the next decade of my life. Get if for ONE DOLLAR, here.
I’m kind of all about self-help right now if you couldn’t tell. With all this time on my hands I’ve got to make the most of it! I know my future self will thank me.
Avacado Chicken Parmasean … CAN?! Doesn’t that look delicious? Well it was. And it was freakin easy, and healthy healthy healthy. Follow recipe here. I’m begging you. Go cook it too so then we can gush together about how delicious it was.
thankful for the best sister ever and sunshine in february