living the questions

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Posts tagged love

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life as a resume

i just dont want to be a person that doesnt realize until theyre in their 40s that they spent too much time chasing after the wrong things. i have hopes and dreams for adventure and reaching my fullest potential in my career, and i think that these things are so important. however, i cant help but notice by middle age most people ive talked to will share that none of their accomplishments mattered if they had neglected the people they loved most-neglected love itself and the kind of fulfillment in life that can come from that and that alone. my mentality has shifted a lot as ive thought about what it will mean to marry my best friend. and in this shift has come an overwhelming sense of satisfaction with my life and whatever the future holds. this is because i’ve made a conscious promise to myself to put my loved ones first. and i truly believe that decisions made with this as the driving factor can only reap life rewards.

the world has so much to offer and a lot of shiny things blinking at us everywhere we turn; reminding us of who we aren’t YET and what we need to DO to make us into the most exciting, attractive human beings. as cliche and obvious as this sounds, the best thing the world has to offer is love and relationship, and i think this twenty-something age is a time where it’s really easy to forget because we’re even more susceptible to all the shiny sparkles. we’re even more apt to define who we are by what we do. i don’t care if you’re a corpo-maniac climbing quickly up the ladder or helping starving children in uganda. there’s always people in EVERY field doing what they’re doing for the wrong reasons, and it usually can be traced back to the fact that they need this experience for their egos… they need to be defined by what they do because they haven’t yet realized that the most important part of life is the people you love and the people you surround yourself with. or they just forgot.

none of this is to say of course that love and relationship doesn’t also accomodate hopes and dreams and adventure. if anything, love as a priority can make these things more beautiful and enriching. i’m only saying that there is a balance, and that when you put the important things first, there’s less ego and fear attached to the other stuff and life can more organically and fulfillingly (totally not a word) unfold. jeez, who am i? my mom?

here’s to reminding ourselves every day that our relationships are what ultimately make us who we are, and that at the end of our life we won’t be sweetly reminiscing over our resumes.




Filed under life realizations love relationship friendship priorities

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why so serious?

"I just want to never stop playing," he told me after we spent part of our Valentines Day celebration playing lazer tag with a bunch of 10 year olds. I agreed. I haven’t thought much up to this point in my life as to the details of what my wedding vows might look like someday. But for some reason, this sentence has been repeating in my brain all week. And it dawned on me that beyond a shadow of a doubt, this will be one of them.

Really though, we all can and should make a commitment to never stop playing; a commitment to our lover, our family, our friends, the world, ourselves. The world has too much light and hope and fun around each corner whether its in a hackey sack or blowing bubbles or a game of tag or hide and seek, to take ourselves too seriously. The world is in a lot of pain on a constant basis, but I also like to think that it is simultaneously laughing and smiling and gasping in gusts of wind and water ripples… reminding us that we just can’t be serious all the time if we’re going to survive this life in a fulfilling way. I firmly believe that committing to play time is committing to loving harder - if you don’t rejuvenate yourself with play time, how will you be able to bring holistic love and joy to others? By not allowing yourself to indulge in this important part of yourself you ultimately hurt yourself the most. So really what I’m saying is, get over yourself and go play! I don’t care how old you are. 

I don’t know about you but I never want to be too stiff or too serious or too cynical to play a game of lazer tag with my lover - whether I’m 16 or 22 or 50 years old. 



Filed under play time joy rejuvenation serious love